


everything i ever wanted

by fictionalparadises



Series: in the quiet of the night [1]
Category: Tiny Meat Gang (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, Angst, Boys In Love, Fluff, They love each other, Violence, basically im obsessed with writing aus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:15:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22821628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fictionalparadises/pseuds/fictionalparadises
Summary: Noel interlaces their fingers. They sit together throughout the entire night. As they watch the sunrise, however selfish the thought, Noel is glad that he’s not alone.
Relationships: Cody Ko & Noel Miller, Cody Ko/Noel Miller
Series: in the quiet of the night [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1640536
Comments: 7
Kudos: 68





	everything i ever wanted

**Author's Note:**

> the prequel is here!! yall are so sweet & i had so much fun writing this
> 
> this is only fiction and its not meant to be taken seriously,,,  
> so yeah enjoy

The mission is clear and simple. Go in, get the confidential documents, get out. As little fatalities as possible. 

Easy.

Noel has done it a million times before—retrieving classified documents—but it’s different this time. 

He supposes everything has been different since his previous partner got killed. Bad timing, HQ had claimed, an accident. Noel was declared mentally sound and got put on another mission within two weeks. 

Life goes on. 

Now he has a new partner, a man around the same age as him who introduces himself as Cody. It’s not his real name, just as Noel isn’t who he really is, but he decides that Cody fits. 

It’s strange to work with anyone else than Aleena. They were two sides of the same coin, had been working together for years. Noel isn’t used to working with a man, and he isn’t used to working with someone who doesn’t _know_ him.

He heard Cody went through some fucked up shit as well. He respects him enough not to ask about it and hopes Cody will do the same for him.

The hotel room they’re staying in is spacious and has a stunning view, but they keep the curtains closed. Safety precautions. 

Besides, they wouldn’t want anyone else to see the state in which their room now abides. The walls are covered in pictures, notes and red wire. The wood of the desk is invisible under the laptops and scattered files that cover it. 

A ding sounds from one of the computers. Cody’s chair rolls over to the desk when he pushes himself off the wall. 

“Dinner reservation for three at the Blue Hill.” 

Noel looks up from his bag. “What time?” 

“Eight.” 

They’ve been doing stake-outs and background checks for weeks. Noel’s sick of being stuck in this damned hotel room. “It’s time.” 

* * *

They go in. They grab the confidential files. They go out. 

Only the bullets rain down on them as they do, Cody nearly gets shot, Noel sees no other option than to kill the three bodyguards that cornered them. 

“Wipe the camera footage of the hotel,” Noel tells Cody once they get back to their room. 

Noel works to get down the pictures and notes in silence, the sound of Cody’s fingers flying over the keyboard the only sound. It’s soothing, somehow. 

It’s soothing that it’s so different from his previous partner, because even if he’ll die before he’ll admit it, Noel misses her. 

Funny how one night can change every-fucking-thing. One tiny mistake, one slip-up, and that’s it. End of the story.

Noel has no intentions to get personally acquainted with Cody Kolodziejysk. It’s easier that way, might give him fewer sleepless nights.

He stuffs all the shit he just took down in a suitcase—he’ll jam them through a paper shredder at HQ soon enough—and starts wiping down the place. 

“Done,” Cody speaks up a while later, slowly getting to his feet.

They clean the hotel room, leaving zero traces of their stay, and when they finally leave at three in the morning with tired eyes and pale faces, they smell like bleach and sweat.

HQ questions them relentlessly, drilling the answers out of them until they’re both seeing double. They make it loud and clear there is no room for error, they have to do better or face the consequences of their sloppiness. 

* * *

New missions. The partnership is strained.

Noel isn’t sure why. It always takes time to get into that rhythm, to get to know each other. But… maybe it _is_ different, because they’re both fucked up, because they both know exactly what happens if you screw up, because they’re both covered in a million fucking scars and desperate to hide it from one another.

They don’t trust each other, and that’s a problem.

They don’t talk, only speak about the mission and only when it’s absolutely necessary, and Noel feels like he’s slowly drowning, his lungs are filling with water and his throat is burning. A slow death, painful and inevitable. 

And when he glances at Cody sometimes, he recognizes the same look on his face, lost and hopeless, chanceless against the current that is dragging him under.

* * *

Noel’s throat feels like it’s on fire when he gets back to their room. His muscles are burning, fingers stiff and painful. Cody is in the bathroom, hands gripping the sink, leaving bloody fingerprints on the white marble.

“Fuck! Man, how could you let him slip away without—”

Cody pushes himself off the counter and walks straight past Noel, who staggers back by the push of his shoulder. He’s fuming, barely able to keep in the insults that burn on the tip of his tongue as he watches Cody grab a gun and load it. 

“I’ll fix it, okay! I’ll fix it, for fuck’s sake.” Cody snaps. He leaves the hotel room without another word, the door slamming shut behind him.

The minutes turn into hours. It starts pouring outside as Noel sits on the bed, eyes fixed on the tv, but he doesn’t hear anything. He tells himself he just isn’t tired, not that he’s waiting for his partner to return.

Three hours. The lock clicks and Cody reenters the room. He’s soaked—not only by the rain, but also in blood. There’s a single cut from his eye to the corner of his mouth, and a few bruises have settled on his face. 

Noel pretends he doesn’t feel slightly relieved that Cody is back. 

* * *

More missions. More opportunities to fuck up.

Noel installs himself in a hotelroom, setting up his long-range rifle in silence. There’s nothing but static coming from his wireless earphone.

“You there?” Cody’s voice falters through the line. 

“Yeah, man. Try a different frequency,” Noel mutters, fingers working steadily to assemble the rifle.

After a few moments, the static fades and Cody’s voice comes loud and clear. “Better?”

Noel hums a reply, concentrating on the lens that he’s looking through. “I can see you.” 

“Good. You ready for this?” 

He inhales deeply. “Of course.”

Cody moves away from the window, leaving the corridor he's been waiting in. Noel adjusts the rifle, now watching the door of the office they’ve been watching for the past week.

A bald man is sitting behind the desk, three bulky, black-clad figures in the room with him. 

It took them a day to come up with the best strategy; it is not easy to storm into someone’s office when said office is on the hundredth fucking floor of whatever skyscraper in New York, and it’s especially not simple when the owner of the office is surrounded by guards at all times. _Keep it swift and clean_ , Noel hears HQ in the back of his mind. 

“Three guards. Two behind him, one near the window,” Noel says.

Cody busts open the door to the office, the gun in his hand a mere extension of his arm. It is an almost poetic sight—wherever he points his fingers, the men fall down, as if on command. The window luckily doesn’t splinter. Noel exhales deeply, eyebrows furrowing as he trains his gaze on the bald man in the chair.

Cody lets the barrel of his gun rest against the man’s forehead. “Where is it?” 

“Where is what?” 

He lets out a humorless laugh. “Need me to spell it out for you?” 

The man shrugs. “By all means, please.” 

Noel can hear Cody’s heavy breathing. “He’s stalling,” Noel mutters through his earpiece. Even through the tiny lens, he can see how Cody clenches his jaw as if to say, _no fucking shit._

The man is calm. Not tensed at all. It scratches this part of Noel’s mind, an itch that tells him something is off but he’s not quite sure what, _just_ out of his reach. The feeling makes him uncomfortable, reminds him of things he doesn’t want to remember. 

Cody and the man talk.

He’s stalling because he’s waiting for something—someone, Noel realizes. He readjusts the rifle. 

The elevator opens. Six men rush out. 

“Behind you,” Noel announces, “Six men coming in.” 

Cody curses under his breath. He moves to the anteroom, able to kill three men with a clear shot, but the remaining ones close in on him quickly.

“Noel? A little help would be appreciated.” Cody grits out, ducking to escape a fist flying towards his face, pressing his gun against the abdomen of one of the guards and shooting once, twice. The man sags in his arms. 

But Noel freezes as he watches Cody fight. His mind is a blur. 

_Don’t hesitate_ , he can hear the rules getting drilled into him, _you will not waver, you will not break._

But the truth is that Noel is already broken, as is Cody, as is everyone else that works for HQ. Broken by the very people that also built them up again. Shattered and reconstructed in a way that it fit _their_ mold, in a way that it convenienced them and them only. 

And now whatever is left of him is chipped, damaged. He is already broken.

His finger lays heavy on the trigger of his rifle. Who is he to decide who lives and dies? Who is he to play God without permission? 

Noel doesn’t believe in God, but this is the closest he’ll ever get to divinity. The power he now holds over those men in the building across is addicting, the adrenaline pumping through his veins a rush he’ll never get enough of.

Only he gets to decide who’ll see the sunrise tomorrow, with the bare flick of his finger. Only him. 

His heart tightens in his chest as he thinks of Aleena. He couldn’t save her. 

Noel pulls the trigger. 

Cody’s breath is ragged as he shoots the other two men, and then bends over, hands on his knees.

Noel shoots the bald man. 

“What did you do?” Cody seethes through the earphone.

“He opened the safe. We didn’t need him anymore.” Noel explains, voice lifeless. He's just so tired.

The office is blood-splattered and reeks of death when Cody finally leaves.

* * *

There is always some enigma between them, a secrecy that condones them from fully seeing each other for what they truly are.

It gets harder to keep the nightmares at bay. Cody’s presence in the room was unfamiliar at first, something that kept Noel’s mind distracted, but now that they’ve been working together for a few months, his conscience has gotten used to it. 

Noel doesn’t want Cody to know about him waking up screaming. He refrains from sleeping most nights as a result, staring at the ceiling until his eyes burn from it.

But he has a feeling Cody wouldn’t judge him for it. Cody has his own ghosts as well—he carries them in a small, silver case. He always, _always_ brings it.

Noel can’t help but wonder what’s inside, what horrors his partner brings along on every single mission. 

Cody leans back in his chair, inhaling deeply. “Mithridatism.” He states when he catches Noel glancing at the case for the millionth time. 

“What?” Noel gives him a bewildered look.

Cody picks up the case and lays it on the bed, fingers spinning the numbers on the combination lock. It clicks open, revealing an array of tiny glass bottles, most filled with amber-colored liquid, and syringes.

“Mithridatism is the practice of protecting oneself against a poison by gradually self-administering non-lethal amounts,” Cody cites, as though he's memorized the definiton word for word. Noel stares at the case, unsure of how to reply, and all he wonders is, _what fucked-up thing happened to him to drive him to this point?_

“Why?” 

Cody’s fingers pry open one of the bottles, carefully filling a syringe with a small amount. “It’s convenient,” he says. Noel watches as Cody injects the poison in his bloodstream. 

It’s fucked up. 

He drops the syringe. It clatters on the ground, a hollow echo in the empty hotel room. He flexes his fingers.

Cody closes the case again. Noel doesn’t say anything about it.

He’s too tired to speak, anyways.

* * *

He wakes up screaming. 

His voice is hoarse, throat dry, and he’s disoriented—it takes Noel a long moment to realize where he is, and with who.

He slowly sits up, trying to even out his breath, and tries to ignore how close the resemblance of the thin layer of sweat is to blood coating his skin.

The darkness is calming as it eats away at him.

Noel slowly turns to the bed beside his. Cody has his hands folded beneath his head and he’s looking at the ceiling like it will tell him the universe’s secrets.

“You okay?” He asks without turning his head.

Noel wordlessly steps into the bathroom and closes the door behind him.

When he lies back down again, releasing a shaky breath, he quietly responds, “No.” 

He thinks Cody has fallen asleep, but after a few minutes, when Noel’s started to doze off again, his reply comes. “Me neither.” 

The two words reassure him more than they should.

* * *

And then everything goes to shit.

Their next mission ends horribly. They planned the whole thing out, took every fucking variable into account. Except the weather. The goddamn weather ruined the whole plan.

Cody would go in while Noel would be on standby with his rifle, just like last time. But it started raining so hard that it made it impossible for Noel to see shit, forcing him to listen to Cody speak. Long minutes passed, the talking suddenly interrupted by multiple, loud footsteps coming in. 

Then the shooting had started. 

“Cody?” Noel asks, a frown etched into his face. No reply. _Fuck, fuck, fuck._

He can hear Cody grunt in pain and adjusts his rifle, hoping to get a glimpse of his partner. 

“It’s a trap,” Cody groans, and it’s a strained answer, a last warning to run. The line disconnects.

Noel is paralyzed. He clenches his hands to stop them from shaking. 

_No_ , he thinks, his mind racing, _not again._ He can’t do this again.

He worked together with Aleena for years—that’s what made it so damn painful to lose her. Cody, he’s only known for six months, yet… 

Cody has never once judged him for having nightmares. He’s somehow become familiar territory in this estranged world. Cody opened up, maybe only a tiny crack in the fortress that is _him_ , but he showed a part of himself, made himself vulnerable. And even if Noel won’t admit it, these months with Cody healed him a little. 

A red scab on a gaping cut. 

It’s one of the basic rules HQ teaches newbies: in cases like these, you have to save yourself. Leave your partner behind, is what they’re saying—hell, you’re not _allowed_ to go in. It’d be a waste to get both agents killed. But Noel knows he won’t survive losing another partner. He can’t do it again.

It takes him mere seconds to come to a decision. After glancing through the lens of his rifle another time to no avail, he jumps up and leaves the empty warehouse he’s been waiting in.

The rain soaks him within seconds, his clothes sticking to his skin make him feel uneasy, but he shoves the creeping thoughts away as he enters the building.

His eyes flit through the room until they land on Cody. Nine against one. It’s surprising that he lasted this long, but from the looks of it, he is at the end of his rope. Cody’s face is bleeding and his left shoulder is dislocated. 

The sight makes Noel’s chest tighten to the point of pain. The second feeling is foreign. 

Two shots, two men down. Cody’s head snaps up and relief floods his eyes. Three more men down. Four remain.

Cody scrambles to his feet, his hands gripping the wall to remain standing. He shoots the first man that launches himself at him, but can’t dodge the second. His nails break, then his fingertips start bleeding as he’s dragged down and his hands grate against the wall.

Noel doesn’t have a clear shot. His mind is spinning, he has to get to Cody, that’s all that matters, and anyone who’s in the way is nothing more than an obstacle waiting to be cleared. Nothing more than a hindrance. 

He shoots the man in front of him, blood splattering his face and into his mouth, the taste coppery and nauseating. He turns his gun to Cody, pulling the trigger, and the eighth man falls on top of him. 

Noel is scrambling towards his partner when he realizes something’s wrong. There were nine men. Only eight are down.

The understanding comes a beat too late and Cody’s yell pierces his ears as Noel trips over his own feet and crashes on the ground. His arm hurts like hell and when Noel reaches down, his fingers are covered in blood.

“Come on,” Cody is by his side in a split second, trying to help him sit up. Noel grimaces, bolts of pain shooting through his arm and chest. Cody takes the gun out of Noel’s hand. The ninth man is down with only one hit.

“We have to go, can you walk?” Cody’s voice is calm, but Noel can hear the slight panic that's starting to creep in.

Noel sucks in a breath as Cody helps him to his feet. They lean on each other’s good sides, rushing through the sleeping city to get to their hotelroom. 

They’re soaked and chilled to the bone from the cold rain outside. Cody hurls up his guts in the bathroom. Noel doesn't know how to react, doesn't know how to comfort his partner—it seems that is a skill he lost years ago. 

So he just watches from the doorpost, unaccustomed to the feeling that he feels in his stomach as he sees his partner throw up, and waits. Cody wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, flushes the toilet and brushes past Noel wordlessly, focusing on the first-aid kit instead. He knocks it over, the clang followed by a string of curse words. 

“Hey,” Noel lays a hand on his right shoulder, “I’ll relocate your shoulder first, then you can stitch me up, okay?” 

Their gazes meet. The glaze in Cody's eyes is unfamiliar.

He doesn’t make a sound when Noel relocates his shoulder with a loud crack, he merely rubs his hand over it cautiously and shrugs slowly. “Thanks.” 

Noel nods with a frown and sits on the bathroom counter near the sink while Cody gathers the first-aid kit. He can’t help but stare as Cody carefully stitches the flesh below his shoulder, his fingers working skillfully and fast. When he’s done, he leaves the room in silence and gives Noel some space to clean up. It takes him too damn long to put on his fucking shirt and he hates it.

He finds Cody on the balcony—it’s stopped raining outside, only a clear sky ahead. He’s sitting against the wall, the chairs in front of him forgotten, knees pulled up to his chest and eyes fixed on the night sky. Noel sits down beside him.

“Thanks for stitching me up.” Noel says quietly. 

He doesn’t get a reply, but doesn’t push further, scared to disrupt the comfort of the stars watching over them.

Minutes pass. Then, “You should have left me.” His quiet tone fails to hide the sharp edge of his rage.

 _There it is._ Another crack in the fortress.

“But I didn’t.” 

Cody’s head snaps to Noel. “It’s rule _one_ , Noel, the first fucking thing we’re taught. If you’d died, that would have been my fault.” 

Noel can barely keep the anger from his voice as he looks at his partner with the same fierceness. “And if _you_ had died, that would’ve been on _me_.” 

The heated stare lasts a beat too long. Cody turns away and crosses his arms, eyes following as he stretches his legs on the cold concrete of the balcony. 

Noel exhales deeply, tipping his head back to rest it against the wall. He breaks the silence after a few long minutes. “My previous partner, she—I didn’t—” He can’t find the words. He feels like he’s out of breath, out of energy—he’s just so fucking tired. Of everything.

A warm hand grasps his. 

“It’s okay. I understand,” Cody softly says, and even though it’s a lie, even though Cody could never understand what Noel has been through and what he’s feeling, it’s still comforting to know that Cody is as fucked up as he is. 

Noel interlaces their fingers. They sit together throughout the entire night. As they watch the sunrise, however selfish the thought, Noel is glad that he’s not alone.

* * *

HQ aren’t happy with them. They’re furious, actually. In fact, they're so furious, they've decided to put their partnership on hold. Cody will be sent on different missions, Noel will take an administrative leave.

Noel feels the world slipping under his feet. The only bit of steady ground he’d gained, taken away from him in a second. 

Cody is waiting outside already. He looks as lost as Noel feels.

* * *

A week passes. Noel sits at home—he’s restless and misses the company of a certain brunette, but he’ll die before he’ll admit that. 

On the fourth day, he gets out of the shower to find his bedroom window wide open, the sky a black void gaping at him. The gun is already in his hand when Cody appears in the doorpost, looking soft and absolutely exhausted.

“Hey,” Noel says, hands dropping to his sides, gun forgotten. 

“I can’t sleep,” Cody whispers, voice close to a sob. “I can’t fucking sleep.” Noel tosses the gun on his bed. “I can’t—I don’t—” Cody tries, letting his head hang when he can’t seem to find the right words.

“It’s okay.” Noel whispers, moving over to grab Cody’s hand and intertwining their fingers. It’s the only form of compassion and affection he can manage. “Sit down. I'll be right back.” 

When Noel returns to the room, Cody’s asleep on his bed. The air gets choked out of Noel, because there’s an exact same image in his memory, only someone else lays on the left side of his bed. 

He can’t go down the same path as last time. He can’t.

Right before he falls asleep next to him, Cody’s even breathing a familiar lullaby to sing him to sleep, he wonders if he hasn’t gone down it already.

* * *

HQ calls a meeting with the two of them. It’s difficult to pretend they haven’t seen each other for a week, especially when Cody has been sleeping in Noel’s bed for four nights now. He disappears before the sun has fully risen and shows up again around nine. Noel doesn’t ask where he goes all day. It’s none of his business, anyways.

“There’s a gala in a week. One of the promoters needs to be eliminated. Swift and clean, without any traces.” The man takes a beat, looks them both in the eye. “One shot to redeem yourselves. Show me you can work together dutifully and you’re in the clear.” 

One shot. It has to be enough.

* * *

They fly to Vegas the next night. Cody checks them into the hotel with two aliases. Their room has a joint bed, and whether Cody specifically asked for it or not, Noel can’t say he cares. He’s a little relieved, if he’s honest.

To scout the venue, they play tourist. It's that simple, for once, but even as Noel laughs while taking pictures and buying silly hats from overpriced kiosks, he feels empty inside. He's only ever pretending. His mind wanders unwillingly, making him imagine what it would have been like if he had grown up like a normal kid. He wonders what this thing between Cody and him could've been.

It's nothing, he reminds himself.

More stake-outs. They go through multiple strategies and end up with the decision to inject the target with maitotoxin once he’s back in his rooms. He’ll die of heart failure—clean, precise, nearly untraceable. 

Noel wakes up screaming again, night after night, even with Cody laying so close to him. He stumbles out of bed with a dazed mind, bewildered and unhinged, as he tries to remember what is reality and what is only a dream. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Cody softly asks as he walks up behind Noel. His hands are gripping the balcony rail so tightly his knuckles turn white, the cold air biting at his skin, but he doesn’t feel it. Is he still dreaming? It's becoming harder and harder to tell the difference.

He can’t—he can’t talk about it. It’s like his throat closes up every time he tries. 

He’s so mad, so fucking livid. At everyone, most of all himself. 

A warm hand on his back pulls him back into reality.

“I let her die.” His voice breaks. The words are an empty echo in the night as he says them aloud. There it is, the truth he’s been avoiding for so long, a realization he’s tried to outrun since she died. 

Cody wraps his arms around Noel from behind. 

“I let her die,” he repeats frantically, unable to stop the tears from coming and for the first time since the incident, he lets himself cry.

Cody’s arms tighten around him, pressing him closer, a gesture that tells him more than words ever could. “You’re gonna be okay,” Cody whispers against his neck and Noel wants to believe him more than anything. “We’re gonna be okay.” 

When he finally falls asleep again, Cody still has his arms wrapped around him. 

* * *

Two tuxedos arrive the next day. Two more days remain to prepare.

Cody spends hours holed up in their hotel room to find the hotel in which the promoter is staying, and once he finally does, he hacks the database to add another reservation for the same night. Noel listens to Cody type away for a large part of the day, but has enough after a few hours.

Noel stuffs his hands in his pockets as he strolls through the city, drowning out the sounds of cars honking and clicking of traffic lights. He thinks about Cody, damns himself for doing so but doesn't make any efforts to change. 

There’s comfort, like someone telling you not to worry, like someone putting a hand on your shoulder and saying it’ll be fine, and then there’s _Cody_ , who is everything and so much more than Noel could’ve ever dreamt of. 

An oasis in the middle of a desert.

When he makes it back to the room, Cody is still sitting behind the laptop, eyes glued to the screen and fingers flying over the keyboard like his life depends on it, and Noel’s heart skips a beat. 

* * *

“You got the keycard, right?” Noel mutters softly when he meets Cody at the bar again. He asks the bartender for some fancy cocktail he doesn’t know with a wink and a smile and turns his face to Cody, whose back is resting against the bar, elbows propped up on the surface.

He nods. “Of course.” 

Noel listens to the music, ignores the urge to bop his head along to it. He regrets not being able to enjoy this night, not being able to take advantage of the free food and drinks and music, even if the gala seems formal and stiff. It’s a waste that he doesn’t get to enjoy Cody’s company like he’d want to, but he signed up for this himself. This lifestyle is not one that leaves much room for personal preferences.

Tonight, he must make every move count. No hesitation, no faltering. He needs to be the weapon he was built to be, shut off his emotions and feelings. He can do that, he tells himself, he can do it for Cody. 

It feels ridiculous, because it feels like his life depends on this night, but… if he fails this mission, he needs to start all over again. 

Noel has been slowly dying for a long time now. The worst part was that he lets himself. Sometimes, Noel looks at Cody when he thinks no one sees him, and he recognizes the same helpless expression, the same despair and melancholy. But when he is with Cody, the world seems a little less miserable than before. Being alive seems a little less bad, then.

“He’s here,” Cody says casually, eyes trailing the target. Noel glances at his watch—eight thirty on the dot, exactly as they expected. If everything goes according to plan, they have about three hours left before they need to move.

Noel opens his mouth to ask a question, but the words feel stupid already, even before he says them out loud, so instead he grabs the drink and turns away. “Go enjoy yourself for tonight.” 

* * *

The minutes pass slowly as Noel doesn’t drink his drink, talks with arrogant businessmen he doesn’t care about and the music gets worse with every song that ends. His eyes scan the room every now and then until they land on Cody, who’s making small talk and meets his gaze with a smirk every time. Noel hates him for it.

He hates himself even more for how tight his pants get every time it happens.

Fucking finally, the promoter leaves. Cody nods and Noel waits a few minutes before he excuses himself from the company he is talking to.

He waits in a deserted corridor until the door opens and Cody enters. Noel stuffs his phone back in his pocket and pushes himself off the wall, matching Cody’s pace as they leave through the back entrance. 

Cody is tense once they sit in the backseat of the black SUV, so Noel doesn’t speak. He looks at the tinted windows and the world that moves past them behind it, the lights and the people and the _life_. He could never be apart of it, could never share the same nonchalance and ignorance these people have. He sometimes wishes he could.

The SUV halts near their hotel. “We have to go through the back,” Noel says, steering Cody into one of the abandoned alleys, hand tightening around the handle of the black suitcase. 

Cody frowns, lifting the fake keycard in the air. “We literally have a key.”

“Too many cameras,” Noel mutters. He shrugs at Cody’s contemplative look. “I looked at the floorplans earlier today.” 

“They weren’t available online.” Not a question.

“Nope.” 

Cody raises his brows. “You never told me you were good at hacking.” 

“It never came up, did it?” He brushes it off, eyeing the closed backdoor. Cody smiles to himself. “How long will it take?” Noel asks, jerking his head to the lock.

“Well, if I had my tools…” Cody begins, turning just in time to catch the small box Noel throws his way. “Son of a bitch—” 

The lock clicks as a key is jammed into the door. Cody’s eyes widen. “Shit—” 

Before his mind can object to the emergency plan he comes up with on the spot, Noel pushes Cody against the wall, hard, and he can hear the air getting pushed out of his lungs as he breathes, “Not a word.” 

And then Noel kisses Cody. 

The door creaks open beside them but Noel can barely hear it over his heart hammering in his chest. It feels so natural. It fits so fucking perfect, and it’s like a part of him is exhaling in relief, sighing _finally_.

“Hey! Go find some other place to dry-hump each other, this is private ground!” He hears over the pounding in his ears and he pulls back to look. 

“Sorry—we were just—we will go,” Noel says, making his words slightly slurred. “We will go.” 

The employee grumbles something inaudible before throwing a trashbag in the container and going back inside. Just before the door can shut completely, Noel jams his fingers between the crevice. 

“Come on.” Noel glances over his shoulder to Cody, who looks as though he’s in a trance, but then he shakes his head and grabs the dropped suitcase before following. Noel recalls the floorplan in mind, listening for footsteps as they go and desperately trying not to think about what he just did.

Cody doesn’t say anything. He visibly tenses up when they’re waiting on the elevator and another guest waits alongside them.

“Evening,” Noel greets the man with a nod, hand brushing past Cody’s as they step into the elevator.

They both stare at the screen as the numbers go up. The man gets out at the second floor, and the silence is still there, but there’s a different kind of tension in the air.

The doors slide open with a ding on the eighth floor.

 _Room 822. 823. 824._

He stops before the number 825. Their room. Cody slips out the keycard and the door opens easily. Noel locks it behind them as Cody opens the suitcase on the bed, holding out the laptop for him. 

“What?” 

He doesn’t look up, fingers brushing over the bottles in the case. “Since you’re so good at hacking, I’ll give you the honors.” His face is serious and for a moment Noel thinks he’s actually pissed, but his tone is light, so he takes the laptop and shoves back the chair to sit at the desk. 

Noel takes the pager and connects it to the computer. He finds the right frequency in under half a minute, putting in earphones to listen to the messages being sent and received. Cody finishes preparing the injection of maitotoxin and leans over Noel’s shoulder to watch along. He takes one earphone.

They listen for five minutes. Six. Seven. Noel wishes he could freeze this moment, with Cody standing so close to him he can feel his body heat, peaceful and so far from fucked up. He tries not to think about the fact that this might be the last moment they share together. The last moment before everything goes to shit.

Cody takes the pen from Noel’s hands, fingers grazing along each other, and scribbles something on the notepad. 

Noel takes the pager and swears that Cody holds his breath as he intercepts the radio traffic to announce, “Two-o-four to three-nine-eight. Someone’s been spotted on the roof. Check it out, to be certain. Over” 

The reply comes five seconds later. Cody releases a shaky breath. “Three-nine-eight to two-o-four. We’re on it, over.” 

Footsteps rush past their door. Cody turns on the timer and watches tensely as it counts down from sixty seconds to zero. Then Noel sends out a message to the single guard that is now standing between them and the promoter. They receive the exact same reply. Another pair of footsteps rushes past their door. 

This is it then, Noel thinks as they stand before room 826. A beginning or ending. Start or finish. 

With one glance at Cody, he kicks open the door.

* * *

They’re standing in front of the elevator again. Their time is almost up—the promoter’s bodyguards will return soon enough, but they’ll find their boss to have passed from heart failure and when that happens, Noel and Cody need to be far, far away from this damned hotel.

The doors have barely closed before Noel grabs Cody’s collar with both hands and pulls him in for a kiss. He can’t care anymore, not when what he wants is _so_ close within reach that his fingers are itching from it.

The case drops on the floor with a loud thud.

“Have I told you—” Noel breathes, “—that you look so fucking good in a suit?” 

Cody whimpers when Noel presses an open-mouthed kiss against his neck. “No, I don’t think so.” He manages to get out, voice breathless.

“Because you do.” Noel grits out, “Got me distracted all fucking night thinking about it.”

“That’s good to hear,” Cody chuckles lightly, hands pressing against Noel’s cheeks to lift his face. 

The doors open again. Two people get in, and Noel forces himself to step back. The lack of contact is excruciating, but Cody casually intertwines their fingers and squeezes tightly. 

The doorman opens the door for them and then they’re outside. The cold air stings on Noel’s skin and it feels like happiness and he feels so free that he wants to yell. 

_Get in the black SUV. Let go of Cody’s hand. Act normal._

It’s so fucking difficult, especially when Cody is sitting so close to him, but it’ll be worth it. 

In the end, it will always be worth it. 

* * *

HQ is willing, for once. They’re allowed to work together. Noel wonders why, though he’s not complaining. 

_Your performance as partners was satisfactory. You will be informed on your next mission together when we require your services._

And that was it. Time to go home.

Noel’s hands tighten around the steering wheel. He doesn’t want to go back to his apartment, dreads the silence it will bring along, the emptiness.

They’ll still have missions separately, but… that’s a small price to pay if he gets to call Cody his partner.

They haven’t talked about the kiss. They definitely should, he determines as he drives home. He’ll get Cody’s address once he can get his hands on a laptop. It’s _definitely_ necessary to talk about the kiss.

But when Noel enters his apartment, flinging his keys on the kitchen counter, Cody’s already sitting on the couch, trying to suppress a grin as he casually types a message on his phone. 

His heart skips a beat. He could get used to this, he decides in that moment. Cody finally looks up and Noel feels like he can suddenly breathe again, like he just broke the surface of the water, like he's no longer drowning and kicking against the current of an endless black sea. When he looks at Cody, his eyes are glistening with the same unreadable emotion, and Noel has never felt so _alive_. 

  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!! might fuck around and write a part three 👀 who knows
> 
> kudos & comments make me v v happy, you can also find me @sundaycore (twitter/tumblr) !!!


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